Dude…Do you even OWN dental floss?
I didn’t take real good care of my teeth as a youngster. Remember the Cavity Creeps? “WE MAKE HOLES IN TEETH!” That was my dental situation pretty early on. I was that idiot kid that would wet his toothbrush at night and yell, “SURE DID!,” if my parents asked if I’d brushed. That master plan didn’t pan out too well later on in life, especially when I added U.S. Army dentistry into the equation. I shudder to even estimate the amount of money I’ve spent on keeping my piehole looking pretty and functioning as designed.
So yeah, I have alot of porcelin and silver amalgam in my head. Even have a dental implant way, way in the back. It makes me feel a little bit Terminatorish if I’m being honest. The rest of my body…not so much. Obviously, all this china in my head isn’t as durable as natural tooth. You should see my wife’s face anytime I crunch down on some hard candy or something. Not a happy visage. I can almost feel a telekinetic wave of psychic energy screaming, “IDIOT!” eminating from her eyes.